Friday, August 13, 2010

I Spam

If one goes by Wikipedia’s definition of Spamming ‘as the practice of sending unwanted e-mail messages, frequently with commercial content, in large quantities to an indiscriminate set of recipients’, Self-spamming ought to be considered an impossible and absurd Oxymoron. How, and, more importantly, why would a person send unwanted messages to oneself? It is like stalking oneself! Absurd, Bizarre and Improbable! I do check my spam mails once in a while. Why, don’t ask me! May be out of boredom, may be out of curiosity or may be for just time pass, I don’t know. But the exercise though futile always, today gave me lot of thoughts to chuckle about. This time when I opened my spam folder which had nearly 1000 spam mails, I was in for a surprise. Oh, not a pleasant one, I assure you. Because when the list of mails flashed on the screen, what did I see? Numerous spam mails from me. I was shocked and dismayed at first, then felt funny and intrigued at the same time. I thought, aha, this had to happen. Emailing is the best way to stir up myself from inactivity to activity. It was as if some shut-out part of my psyhe realised this and was using the power of Gmail to influence me by pushing in unsolicited messages. While grudgingly acknowledging the right of this shut-out part, I scanned the contents of my spam mails that I had sent to me. And what were the messages that I had spammed myself with? Special Discounts on Pfizer,Viagra, other pharma products, watches etc just for me. Its as if my shut-out part after a great deal of analysis decided that these are the things that were missing from my life and which I should feel the need. And there were also messages like ‘Give her no rest tonight! and blah blah’. I hope you got the drift. This made me stop in my tracks. See, if I am spamming myself then why its not ‘him’ but ‘her’ in the messages. Why the confusion over gender? Is my cyber self, the shut-out part facing the worst possible identity crisis? I should send a SOS mail to, perhaps, God Almighty!

PS: Come to think of it, spam mails can be an interesting subject of study. You can theorise about how they have evolved over the years, changing contents, methods, targets, rate of success etc.

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